It’s Time To Learn From Criticisms – Story #1.

by Patrick Liew on July 31, 2018

It’s Time To Learn From Criticisms – Story #1.

Recently, I bumped into an old friend who looked excited to see me.

He said, “Hey buddy! Haven’t seen you for such a long time. We should really catch up.

“How’re you doing? I remember you when you were young.

“Most of us thought that you would do well in life.”

At that point in time, I was in the mood for one of my usual self-deprecating jokes.

“Nah! I didn’t quite make it in life.

“I’m just a struggling salesperson, trying to make ends meet.”

Suddenly, I saw a change in his facial expression.

His disposition was not as enthusiastic as when he first started the conversation.

It was quite clear that he didn’t want to associate with somebody below his status.

I went on to ask him, “So, when can we catch up for coffee?”

His reply was such a dampener that it almost made me laugh.

I’m still amused by it.

He replied, “I’m quite a busy man. Hardly anytime in the day.

“And I have to spend lots of time with my children in the evening.

“Let’s see how things goes.”

We then went our separate ways.

Much later, I asked myself, What can I learn from this conversation?

Our Creator has made all of us to be equal.

We have equal rights, opportunities, and pathways to achieve successes.

Nobody has the right to look down on anybody.

If anything, we should develop a disdain for the holier-than-thou attitude in society.

It really does not matter what you do for a living as long as you’re doing something honest.

Whether you are a lorry driver like my late father, a labourer like my mother, a construction worker like my late eldest brother, or a taxi driver like one of my best friends, we should be contented and be proud of our jobs.

We should do our jobs to the best of our abilities because it is not what we do but how we do what we do that makes us professionals.

We are no less important than any president, CEO, or king.

We should be friendly to one another and extend warmth to every person that crosses our paths.

If possible, we should lend a listening ear and a helping hand to assist the next person we meet to help him find more fulfilments in life.

Why do people pass judgements and look down on others?

Let me hazard some guesses.

Many do it because it makes them feel that they are better than the others and are therefore in a position to pass judgements on them.

They feel good and superior about themselves.

Some do it as a way to escape from themselves.

Instead of confronting their own weaknesses and feeling bad about them, they redirect their attention on others.

There could also be one more reason and it has to do with having a mental disorder, including suffering from an obsessive compulsive disorder or a borderline personality.

Their sense of “right”eousness and belief in their own “rightness” make them see the wrongs in others and do the wrong things.

Quite possibly, there are also people who run others down as a form of revenge and to spite others.

They don’t have the courage to straighten things out and they consciously or unconsciously decide to bring others down.

It is also possible that many harbor good intentions to help others change and become a better person.

However, they have a mistaken notion that the more they criticise others, the more and faster these people will change and improve their lives.

Whatever the reason, it takes a small mind to see the speck on another person’s eyes and not the beam in his own eyes (Mathew 7:5).

A magnanimous spirit sees good in others.

He looks down on others only because he wants to lift others up so that they can live a much better life.

Go4It!

I hope this message will find a place in your heart.

By the way, I have also recorded other reflections.

Please ‘Like’ me on https://m.facebook.com/patrickliewsg

Please visit my website, http://www.patrickliew.net

Follow me on:

https://www.quora.com/profile/Patrick-Liew-5

Visit my Inspiration blog at https://liewinspiration.wordpress.com/

For my opinions on social affairs,
please visit my Transformation blog at http://hsrpatrickliew.wordpress.com/

Let’s connect on instagram.com/patrickliewsg
– via @patrickliewsg

https: //twitter.com/patrickliew77
– via @patrickliew77

My LinkedIn

http://www.linkedin.com/in/liewpatrick

My Quora https://www.quora.com/profile/Patrick-Liew-5?share=24abf3c1&srid=uL2Gz

Please read my reflections and continue to teach me.

Life is FUNtastic!

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

I Have Failed…And Failed…And Failed…

by Patrick Liew on July 31, 2018

I Have Failed…And Failed…And Failed…

Failure is part and parcel of a successful life.

The only way to avoid it is to live for nothing and do nothing. Life will then not be worth the living.

Failure acts as a signpost on the journey to success.

It is a good servant but a bad master.

When we take failure by its horns and respond to it positively, it can change the way we live our life and put us on track to success.

Failures can also help us inculcate many positive values.

These values include humility, self-regulation, grit, and resilience.

These values can stay with us long after we have forgotten many classroom lessons.

They can also bring out the best from us.

In other words, we can successfully fail our way to success.

These are some of the powerful lessons I learned from failure.

There are many more that I like to share with you.

Part 1 – I Failed.

In 1990, Richard Tan and I started a business together.

He is not just a partner, he’s a good friend and a living inspiration.

We were conned into selling a new product in an untested market.

We were kept in the dark about its side effects.

Within a short period of time, we had many unhappy customers at our doorsteps.

The company was inundated with a growing number of complaints, threats, and even potential legal issues.

Every single cent we had was poured into trying to dig the company out of the ever-deepening pit of hell.

It was almost impossible for us to turn the corner.

Meanwhile, we could not start a new business nor could we look for a job.

We were painted into a corner and there seemed to be no way out of it.

When I reflected about this and many other failures in my life, I realized every one of them carried seeds of meaning, purpose and significance.

Failures can provide feedback to help us learn and improve.

They can invoke a commitment for positive attitude, character and behavior.

These qualities are essential for achieving success.

As mere detours on the journey of life, failures can correct us so that we can achieve better results.

They compel us to develop new knowledge and skills.

As a result, it can take us to a higher level in life.

That was what happened to Richard and I.

When we could not look outward for a solution, we looked upward and inward.

Thankfully, by a stroke of divine inspiration, we decided to change ourselves and totally transform our business model.

Instead of feeling depressed and wallowing in sorrow, Richard and I started to dream again.

In fact, we started to dream big dreams.

All my life, I am passionate about dreams.

I choose to have the courage to dream dreams.

My fear is that I may join the throngs that have lost their dreams and desire for dreaming.

Perhaps because our desperation quotient (DQ) was at its peak, we dared to dream what many would call an impossible dream.

We wanted to change the world.

More specifically, we wanted to change the world through education.

Education is one of the greatest equalisers in life.

It is a fast track to help people expand their potential and enhance their performance.

It can also empower them to achieve progress and enable them to achieve their pursuit.

At that point, Richard and I made a commitment, “As we do our part to contribute to the education industry, we will turn our awesome dream into a reality.”

We had a big dream but a simple plan.

In short, we told ourselves, “We will persuade world-class gurus and engage them to train ordinary persons on the street.

“What’s more, we will make the lessons available, accessible and affordable.

“By doing that, we will improve standards of performance and quality of life. We will strengthen communities and make the world a better home.”

As I reflected on this part of my life, I realised that there is nothing wrong with failure.

In fact, a lot of good can come out of it.

It’s how we respond to it that makes it good or bad.

We can grumble, grouse and gripe about them.

It can also make us view life negatively.

Tragically, that’s the reaction many choose to adopt in the face of failure.

Many are defeated before they leave their houses and even before experiencing a failure.

They have already failed in their minds and that is one of the worst failures.

Many feel more comfortable to choose an easier option and give up.

They are more inclined to go back to the old ways.

On the other hand, we can choose to see failure as an opportunity and not as a problem.

Failure is not final unless we fail to learn from it and press on to a higher level of achievement.

As a result of the failure, I went through one of the biggest transformational experiences in my personal and professional life.

The rest as I would like to tell you was history but history was not that easily crafted.

Richard and I faced many more seemingly insurmountable challenges.

Along the way, we had more than our fair share of discouragement, even from those who were close to us.

We also went through many other deep-seated fears and painful failures.

To be successful, we need to learn how to fail successfully so as to achieve enduring success in our life.

If we live without preparing for potential of failures, we have failed to live properly.

In fact, the more we stretch ourselves and go far in life, the higher are the probabilities of going through a failure.

We need to prepare ourselves for failures.

More importantly, we need to develop skills to handle failures and respond to them proactively.

At that point, little did I realised that my value system would be subjected to severe tests and reinforcements.

Part 2 – I Failed Again.

In our innocent minds, Richard and I thought that with our noble dream, we should have no problem in getting support for our life-changing enterprise and gaining traction.

It looked easy until we hit the first roadblock.

Our first long-distance call was to Mr Tom Hopkins, an internationally renowned trainer.

We had rehearsed a well-crafted script to win him over to our altruistic mission.

It did not take long to convince him to fly all the way to Asia to be our first keynote speaker.

In fact, he sounded very passionate about helping us.

Our goal was almost accomplished until he quoted to us his professional fees.

When we heard it, we felt like a meg truck had smashed into our hearts.

Our dream almost died on the spot.

He was asking for far more money than our projected revenue for the seminar.

In fact, it was even more than the profit that we could earn in a year.

To make matters worst, his fees did not cover his traveling, accommodation and out-of-pocket expenses.

It was almost impossible to pay him and keep the company afloat.

Even though we hit a road block, failure was not an option for us.

Our minds went on an overdrive to find a solution.

We took full responsibility for our failure.

It includes developing accountability and exercising our ability to respond to it.

One of the powerful lessons we learned from failure is that we may not be able to change the challenges.

However, we can change our responses to them by finding meaning in these experiences and values from them.

We may not be able to change the situation but we can look for the purpose in the situation and rise above it.

We can take massive action to achieve our goal and live a better life.

Instead of giving up as a victim, we can focus on our dream and not over dwell on failure.

We can rise up to become a victor on the journey of life.

Richard and I decided that we would never run away from failure.

Our desire to fulfill our dream was stronger than the fear of failure.

Our determination to succeed was greater than paying the price for it.

We spent many days and nights exploring all possibilities but every one of them could not work.

That was true until Richard came to me with an almost-impossible idea.

He told me excitedly one day, “Why don’t we book the Indoor Stadium for the Congress?

“If we can fill up the Stadium, we can afford to pay Mr Hopkins. At the same time, we can make it affordable for every working person to attend our life-changing programme.”

My immediate response was, “Are you crazy? Nobody has ever used the Stadium for training purposes.”

“Besides, it’s too expensive. There are too many risks and it may end up killing our business. We may even become bankrupt and may never ever recover from it!”

You can imagine I was putting on the best persuasion cap.

I must have exhausted all reasons to stop him from committing commercial suicide.

Richard just stopped me midstream and asked me a simple question, “Why not?

“Why can’t we dare to dream and turn the dream into a reality?”

That question stunned me for a moment and caused me to reflect over our mission.

I was reminded that Success Resources, the company that Richard and I founded was built on a vision to touch lives, bless families, enhance communities, and improve society.

The questions that haunted my mind was, “Why am I not prepared to stake my all to turn the vision into a reality? How can I not get out of of my comfort zone to transform lives?”

As I meditated over this experience, I realised that very often it is not failure that has stopped many people on their journey to success, it is the fear of failure.

It is unfortunate that when they run away from fear of failure, they also run away from the fruit of success.

Failure is only a temporary setback.

It becomes terminal when we give up trying and we stop believing that we can succeed.

At that point, Richard and I hung on to hope and optimism.

We burned our bridges and invested everything we had to book the Stadium and organise the Congress.

Many people thought we had gone off our rockers, including the manager running the Stadium who was visibly shocked by our endeavour.

We discovered when we had an electrifying dream, many people will rally behind to support it. Within a short while, we sold about 1500 tickets.

Excited with the initial results, we called Mr Hopkins to share with him the good news.

That was when we had a shock of our life.

He told us, “I will not and cannot speak at your ongress. The reason is, we did not have a contract. I may be engaged during that period.”
Having brought up to believe that ‘My word is my bond,’ I could not believe my ears.

We had gone through the details and gotten a verbal agreement from him, how could he walk out on us?

Okay, that was an excuse.

I had to blame someone and justify my failure in conducting my business properly.

That was the way of losers.

Fortunately, I recovered fairly quickly and returned back to the straight and narrow way.

You may have realised that failure results from a series of small mistakes.

If our mind is open, we will be able to sense the signs leading to a failure.

Unfortunately, they are frequently ignored and not responded to in a positive way.

That’s what the path of failure and destruction is strewn with – small little errors and mistakes that snowball over time.

The conscience eventually becomes vulnerable to negative thought, words and behaviour.

These actions are hard wired into the mind and they become a habitual way of life, leading to a failure.

That’s why we need to learn from every failure.

If we do not learn from it, we have failed a second time and in one of the worst ways.

Some of the saddest words that I have ever heard or read were, I could have done something about it.

These regrets could not unwind the clock and put to right the outcomes of a failure.

Instead of walking away, Richard and I decided to confront the odds.

We took the next possible flight to negotiate for the ‘life buoy’ to save our business – a contract with Mr Hopkins.

To cut a long story short, the National Achievers Congress became the first and still the only series of personal development seminars to be held at the Indoor Stadium.

That year, we invited not just one but eight other world-class speakers to inspire and influence thousands of hungry minds.

We took the company to heights that no other company has been able to achieve.

Not only were we able to consistently fill the Indoor Stadium and other convention halls, we went on to to also achieve similar feats in many other countries.

More importantly, we have lost count on the thousands of participants who melted our hearts with words such as, “Thank you. Your seminars changed my life,” “I became rich and wealthy,” “You guys saved our marriage and family,” and the frequently heard, “Our business was able to take off!”

We are proud of the fact that we became one of the pioneers in lifeskills training for adults.

Many of our participants became renowned authors, trainers and coaches, and became our partners in the exciting talent-development industry.
These achievements and many other concrete examples of how we were shaping lives motivated us to increase the stakes and expand our dream.
We took on even more and bigger challenges.

The growth of our company could only be described as phenomenal.

I wished I could tell you there was a fairy tale ending to the story but life had many other shocks and surprises in store for us.

Spurred on by the success, we continued to reinvest all our profits to press on to “change the world.”

Just when we were about to see a glimpse of the new world, tragedy struck.

Part 3 – I Failed Again.

Richard was diagnosed with cancer.

When I heard about the sad news, I confess that I harboured thoughts of closing the company.

I could not bear to see my friend suffer in the process of managing it and worst, to see the fruit of his labour go down the drain.

Later, I realized failure is a much better teacher than success. To be a winner in life, we need to to go and grow through every failure.

Failures spur us to reflect on desired overcomes and drive us to overcome whatever challenges to achieve them.

If we learn from a failure and act on its powerful lessons, we can bounce back from any fall and rise up higher than before.

We can rise up as wiser and stronger persons.

We can be shaped and moulded for a higher calling and greater achievement.

That’s what we learned when Richard was down with cancer.

His sickness could not have happened at a worst time.

We had expanded into many countries by then and we had launched a range of new products and services.

Richard had to undergo chemotherapy treatments while at the same keep up with a heavy traveling schedule to keep the company going.

With two young children in tow, the company’s future was doomed.

To make matters worst, we were organizing the National Achievers Congress at the Hong Kong Coliseum and it had a total seating capacity of 12,500 people.

At that point in time, only 250 tickets were sold and we had only about 8 weeks left to make it a success.

Richard pleaded with his doctor to let him continue the chemotherapy treatments in Hong Kong.

In between treatments, he led the sales force from early morning to the dead of the night.

They knocked on doors after doors and to increase number of clients.

I would never forget what he once told me.

He said, “When I set out to accomplish a goal, it means the world to me.

“Goal-setting is an integral part of my self esteem. I put in my honour as a human to make it work.

“I’m willing to die to achieve my goal. If I set a goal and do not believe in achieving my goal, life is not worth living.”

These shocking statements originally did not sit well with me.

Over the years, I have seen Richard breaking one record feat after another and leading our company from strength to strength.

I realized there was a tremendous amount of wisdom and truth in his work ethos for winners in life.

I learned that when winners fail, they can fail gloriously and successfully.

In 1995, he stood on the stage – without hair – at the National Achievers Congress in Hong Kong.

He inspired participants with his indomitable spirit and fierce determination to make dreams come true.

He told the audience, “Don’t quit until you win. You’re not out of the race until you quit.

“It can be a long corner but it’s just around the corner.”

After that amazing success, there were celebrations and jubilation all over the company.

Little did we know it was but only the calm before the storm.

In fact, what hit us subsequently was more like a tsunami.

Part 4 – I Failed Again.

Prior to the heat of the Asian Crisis, we made a very bad investment and it caused us to lose almost everything.

We were at the brink of bankruptcy and needed millions of dollars to bail ourselves out.

That’s when we discovered once again that the person who usually succeed is the person who never runs away from a failure.

Winners are people who never give up.

They develop grit and resilience to press on to success.

If we don’t give up, we will never lose. When we give up, we’re out of the race forever.

The race may seem long but the finishing line is just around the corner.

Therefore, do not give up on your dream.

When you continue to dream, failures will become less formidable and easier to overcome.

That’s what happened to Richard and I. When our world almost came to an end, our dream kept us going.

At that point, we needed to rake in more than $4 million within four months or else our life-changing mission would have to come to an end.

We decided to change our business model again.

We asked ourselves, “If education can change lives and help achieve exponential growth, can we accelerate the technology transfer and results for our clients?”

The resulting epiphany helped us to redesign our game-changing architecture and innovate a completely new way of running seminars.

We were happy to note that our model has been adopted by many of our colleagues in the industry and it has been a blessing to them.

Currently, Success Resources is arguably the largest seminar organizer in the world.

Our personal development seminars are probably the longest established and most successful series of such seminars in the market.

We work with some of the biggest names and the most respected experts in the industry.

From T. Harv Eker, President Bill Clinton, Prime Minister Tony Blair, Robert Kiyosaki, Richard Branson, Donald Trump, Michael Porter, to Anthony Robbins, we are now organising seminars for such experts all over the world and changing lives through their words of wisdom.

Through various programmes, we have helped to share cutting-edged knowledge and expertise online and through bricks and mortar to clients in more than 61 countries.

No other company has been able to match our record in terms of global reach, influence, and results.

Success Resources has been helping people from different cultures and through multiple languages to achieve greater successes in life.

We have helped to transform many lives and earn the admiration and respect of many people all over the world.

If Success Resources had not failed and clung on to the verge of corporate death, we would not be compelled to reinvent the company.

Our dream would not have become a worldwide movement.

Looking back, I am thankful that failures have become stepping stones to success and not millstones around my neck.

It has softened me, strengthened me, and enlightened me.

It has softened me in the sense that it has humbled me and made me more of a human.

I can better understand and feel for people who are facing challenges in their lives.

It made me a more empathetic and approachable person.

Failures strengthened me to become a wiser and better person.

To overcome failures, I had to put in more effort to strengthen major life skills.

I have to improve my knowledge, attitude, skills and habits – all of which made me a stronger person.

In the process of resolving downsides of failures, I have learned how to persist and persevere so as to achieve desired results.

I became more resilient in facing other challenges in life.

Failures have enlightened me to realise that there are many ‘Patrick Liews’ out there who are facing different kinds of challenges.

I want to inspire them with how we turned failures and downsides into an advantage of a higher order.

I want to serve them so that they will not be left behind on the highways and byways of life.

Instead, they will become leaders for the good of society.

In short, without confronting failures, I would have never truly lived and succeeded in anything.

In conclusion, please don’t let any failure go to waste.

There is a proverbial phoenix that can soar to the stars from it – and that winner can be you.

Go4It!

I hope this message will find a place in your heart.

By the way, I have also recorded other reflections.

Please ‘Like’ me on https://m.facebook.com/patrickliewsg

Please visit my website, http://www.patrickliew.net

Follow me on:

https://www.quora.com/profile/Patrick-Liew-5

Visit my Inspiration blog at https://liewinspiration.wordpress.com/

For my opinions on social affairs,
please visit my Transformation blog at http://hsrpatrickliew.wordpress.com/

Let’s connect on instagram.com/patrickliewsg
– via @patrickliewsg

https: //twitter.com/patrickliew77
– via @patrickliew77

My LinkedIn

http://www.linkedin.com/in/liewpatrick

My Quora https://www.quora.com/profile/Patrick-Liew-5?share=24abf3c1&srid=uL2Gz

Please read my reflections and continue to teach me.

Life is FUNtastic!

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

It’s Time To Run Away From “Energy Vampires”.

July 31, 2018

It’s Time To Run Away From “Energy Vampires”. You are very much the result of the people you interact with. These people can either lift you to a higher level or lead you down the mud of life. Therefore, choose your friends carefully and develop positive relationships with them. Make a list of potential models […]

Read the full article →

Drama Of Life – What Are Your Roles In It?

July 31, 2018

Drama Of Life – What Are Your Roles In It? If life is a drama and we play different roles in it, take proactive steps in crafting your own script and choosing your own parts in it. Make a decision to play different roles to support different people. In doing so, make a positive difference […]

Read the full article →

When Life Throws You A Lemon… (Your response please).

July 31, 2018

When Life Throws You A Lemon… (Your response please). When life throws you a lemon, rejoice! It’s an opportunity in disguise to learn, improve, and get better results. When life throws you a lemon, plant its seeds and aim to become a lemon tycoon. When life throws you a lemon, overcome the challenge and use […]

Read the full article →

My edited letter in the print edition of The Sunday Times on May 20, 2018, with the headline ‘A meritocratic society must also help those falling behind’.

July 31, 2018

My edited letter in the print edition of The Sunday Times on May 20, 2018, with the headline ‘A meritocratic society must also help those falling behind’. https://www.straitstimes.com/forum/letters-in-print/a-meritocratic-society-must-also-help-those-falling-behind Go4It! I hope this message will find a place in your heart. By the way, I have also recorded other reflections. Please ‘Like’ me on https://m.facebook.com/patrickliewsg Please […]

Read the full article →

Walk The Path Of Giants

July 31, 2018

Walk The Path Of Giants As much as the swirls and twirls of DNA Create the who in you and me, We are molded along the way By other matters of vast significance. Who cradled, who taught, who disciplined The little boys and girls we once were; Whether we did well or whether we sinned […]

Read the full article →

Enough Is Enough! – It’s Time To Stop Gun-Violence Problems.

July 31, 2018

Enough Is Enough! – It’s Time To Stop Gun-Violence Problems. I felt very sad to read about another senseless shooting and killing in the US. As a retired soldier in the reservist, I like to think few people know the dangers and harms of firearms better than soldiers. So, I once wrote my 2-cent worth […]

Read the full article →

It’s Time To Prevent Yourself From Having A Scarcity Mindset.

July 31, 2018

It’s Time To Prevent Yourself From Having A Scarcity Mindset. The scarcity mindset is based on a “There-is-not-enough-and-therefore-I-must-win” or “survival of the fittest” mentality. To people with a scarcity mindset, life is a zero-sum game. There is a degree of fear that if they win less, others will win more. This win-lose or lose-lose attitude […]

Read the full article →

Building A “Gotong Royong” Spirit

July 31, 2018

Building A “Gotong Royong” Spirit In the final analysis, the motives, means and ends of any government policy and initative is to strengthen Singapore and improve quality of life. That should be the focus and basis for evaluating success of the 4G and future generations of government. The 4G political leaders should therefore catalyze our […]

Read the full article →