Being Gracious

by Patrick Liew on June 13, 2011

Recently, I was actively involved in discussing political issues on the Net. In particular, I participated in one ‘hot’ e-forum, facilitated by a well known politician.

It was hot because there were many camps involved. The debates had escalated to a point where the participants were calling each other names.

The forum had gone off tangent with unhealthy insults, insinuations and instigations. Even though I could not see them, I could feel the temperature rising.

At various stages, the politician was invited to referee the discussion and to voice his views. However, he chose to remain silent – which I thought was a wise decision.

Meanwhile, I tried to steer the discussion back to the main theme. I aimed to remain objective despite the rough husting, and a fleshly call to spill some digital blood.

I endeavored to focus on the issues, and not the personalities. I chose to be cool, calm and collected rather than be fierce, furious and fiery.

More than anything else, I wanted to appeal both to the head as well as to the heart. I believed there should always be a place for kindness, graciousness and compassion in any situation.

At one point, I almost fell off my chair when the politician intervened and affirmed my opinion. While I felt elated, I thought it was not a good move as we were in the midst of another heated point.

I believed my approach to the forum has struck a chord in his mind. I must have moved his heart to risk having the participants’ feelings running against him.

On reflection, my takeaway from this experience is that we can agree to disagree agreeably. We do not have to burn the bridges to bring our point across.

More importantly, I should always accord a healthy degree of respect to others. I should be sensitive to other people’s feelings.

I should never lose my temper. Even if I do, I should never take it out on anybody and invoke pain on him or her.

It is not much of a point, as the saying goes, to win a battle but lose the war – win an argument but lose a friend or a client.

I hope this message will find a place in your heart.

Life is FUNtastic!


Question: How can we extend more kindness to others?


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