Judging Others

After my last “retirement,” I invested a lot of time to help SMEs grow their business.

I realised many of the CEOs are fond of criticizing others and throwing mud at their competitors.

Why do they do it?

Let me hazard the following guesses:

1. It makes them feel that they are better than others. They are therefore in a position to pass judgements on them.

They feel good and superior about themselves.

2. They do it as a way to escape from themselves. Instead of confronting their own weaknesses and feeling bad about their weaknesses, they redirect their attention on others

3. They do it as a revenge and to spite others. They don’t have the courage to straighten things out with the other parties and they consciously or unconsciously decide to bring the others down.

4. It is also possible that they have good intentions to help others to change and to become a better person.

They have a mistaken notion that the more they criticise others, the more and faster these people will improve their lives.

What are the consequences of being judgemental?

1. If you are a judgemental person, you will eventually paint a poorer image of yourself than the person you are criticizing.

In fact, you may already have unknowingly built up a negative reputation for complaining, criticizing and condemning others.

2. Nobody likes a self-righteous person. People will avoid you if you continue to play ‘god’ or ‘judge’ in their lives.

If you persist, eventually there will be nobody to judge as your friends would have abandoned you.

3. When you judge others, you will have no space in your heart and mind to see the good in others and build a positive relationship with them.

You may end up living a lonely life and the only person left to criticise is yourself.

4. When you pass judgements on others, you are also inviting others to pass judgements on you. It’s fair game.

If you expect others to be perfect or to set a high standard, others will also expect you to be perfect and to set a high standard in your life too.

5. People will hold you to your yardsticks in life and are inclined to expose you if you don’t walk your talk. In fact, they may become more conscious about the downsides in your life.

As a result, you may bring unnecessary attention to your weaknesses and magnify them for the world to see.

6. When you point a finger at others, not only will four fingers be pointing back at you, people will soon notice that your fingers are not entirely clean and innocent too.

7. When you judge others in their absence, they may also judge you in your absence. They may also not give you a chance to defend yourself if you don’t give them a chance to defend themselves.

8. Soon the people who genuinely want to help you will stay away from you for fear of being judged by you.

As we are all frogs in the well to different degrees, you will suffer the Johari Window syndrome. Nobody will help you see your downsides and help you improve yourself.

You’ll be none the healthier, wiser and better as a person.

Hopefully, judgmental persons will soon realize that throwing mud at one other will only make each other muddy.

Spewing poison at one another will only cause each other to die of poison.

Go4It!

I hope this message will find a place in your heart.

By the way, I have also recorded other reflections.

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